Placebos

it's in the special way we fuck...


Sometimes Pain can be abusive, sometimes, a real pleasure. During the last times I have realized I forgot how to win at russian roulette or how to talk like a politician or to think like an autist. Dreaming of golden times, The decadence era or however you want to call it. Wolfes Age, Sheep become the new threat and roaches, rats and Pigeons keep ruling the world without us noticing. Become a slave of stupidity, not thinking not thinking, ignoring boredom, pain, difficulty, cold, heat, love, hate, etc. Stupidity is they key of happiness. Buy a gas mask, Get a job, Work, be rich, Become famous, fuck an astonishing blonde ( every morning and every day) fuck her best friend ( in the weekends) have a nice appartment, Ikea classy fourniture. smell clean, Wear Expensive clothing, Be a child of the first world, work, be a slave, a zealot, obey, pray, don't think, don't think, Allow people to use you, be easygoing, chitchat. Chitchat as a the exclusive code of human relationship. be simple, be arrogant, Pretend to be smarter ( but be an asshole). pretend, Spend, Spend, Waste, Fuck, Dream of being the principal character of my nightmares. Fuck for cheap, Be an expensive prostitute. Lie; Lie to your parents, Lie to yourself. Enslave, Kill memories. Kill regrets, Don't think. Don't argue, Obey, Be stupid, Stupid is good. Masturbate mentally 365 times a second. be bright a second in 365 a day. Be insolent, Easygoing, be malsain, be stupid, dont think dont argue, dont shit. Breathe, Work, Wash your teeth, clean your ass, pop the acne in your face, shave your innerparts. don't look. be blind. Think just on not thinking...

Be a Placebo Junkie

Colombia, Like Macondo, Are a bunch of good souvenirs that Never Happened....

Madre no hay sino una... y tiene 49 años!!!!

Feliz cumpleanos mama te Amo mucho!!!!

Something About the Ashtray Girl

she's funny
She's mysterious
She smells like spring flowers
she looks like Aurora Borealis
She's the woman of my dreams ( and the one of my nightmares)
she's got a nice ass
She sings like a siren
she kisses like medusa ( she stones me)
she lives in my cloud
she cooks wonderfully
she dreams of me
in the morning, She smells like napalm
In the night, she smells Like Haaring Fish
She works, a lot
she's smart
she's sexy ( and classy)
She's charming... the way I like her to be
She's 60
She's a pain in the ass ( a sadomasochistic sodomic pleasure)
she's a musician ( and no one cares, and no one knows)
she's got a funny family name
she's different from me
she understand my shit
she gets pissed at me
she's got a big forehead ( like a moai wannabe)
she's a little godess
she's strong
she knozs about stones, books, theater and many many things you don't know about
she has a sister I like
she Hates my past being part of my present
and so what?
she kisses good
she's busy, and impossible....

she does not exist
but I found her.

A a n v a l l e n ! Wall travelling

tic tac tic tac tic tac tic tac...

seconds pass as we waste our time counting time, thinking, probably in the toilet or in some cold street. Spring came along with edlira's B day. I am turning old I realize, As adventures turn everyday even more conventionnal, I have been living the live of the Spectator and not the illusionist actor I was times ago. Now I watch arab men Singing Italian operas in the metro, as my head bangs dreaming of some spanish cheap grunge...

School started again, what can I say, It was supposed to start a week ago or two, I dont even care. I enjoy the dream of becoming this talented Architect we all dream to be, just to say Politics are my thing. the Dream of changing something four our people and the others. Pollution is fucking us up.. but Humanity Fucked us up a long time ago.. and well.. technically, your loved one fucks you up in more senses that you wish it did... smile, This is a Kodak Moment; The first day of the end of Our lives.

I have this crazy Class where I am supposed to write an article about Extreme architecture, I chose the bunker as a model of extreme architecture and my subject is Human paranoia reflected in housing. We all try to protect ourselves constantly. We clothe up To avoid cold, we buy houses to have a place to live and not find ourselves in the streets ( Sometimes i Miss those days) as we go and put money in the bank to avoid get robbed or we put rings about the ones we love to avoid extracurricular Love.. WE ARE ALL AFRAID!!! WIE HABEN ANGST!
In the parisian metro someone placed An advertising with " N' ayez pas peur" ( don't be afraid). everyone looked at it freaking out.. realizing that the only thing they have been constantly doing in their life is being scared.. We Hurry to protect, To defend, Not to become stronger... we avoid sickness instead of becoming immune, We avoid pain by being stupid and not controlling life by the use of intelligence. we play safe, and we forget about fun.. High Quality fun.

What I like about my class is the teacher, this fucked up guy that had the brain of a wikipedia and the humor of the pervert that watched porn laughing like any other american comedy. He invited me to a conference about an israeli guy talking about military tactics that consist in opening holes through houses instead of using conventionnal roads ( because the palestinian will wait for you in the road, so we walk through the walls). my Dream, Crossing walls, They do it with a hammer and the price of terror in the heart of some palestinian families that 5 minutes after, had the whole Israeli army crossing through their house, leaving only a Pair of holes, like a city tag ( Likhud was here!) and they leave, they destroy, they cross walls, dig their own gruyère, a jewish version of the blitzkrieg, the perfect remix of avoiding danger and becoming stronger...

People run, Israel invades crossing Walls and demolishing houses making this avenues with a fancy Amerikanskimade bulldozer, Colombians die under the symphony of the Kalashnikov, French get bored and just complain...

I shall cross Walls of the impossible now, I shall Run through people, opening holes in their hearts and minds, I shall Grow stronger,turn older, Leave the bitter Aside and Start making miracles again, With a carboard on the autobahn, 50 euros in De Wallen a cigarrette over Karluv most or a smile in bloku... I miss the days of the parisian metro with a spaghetti cacerole in my hands.. I miss the Miracle

Gezuar Anniversaire Nena Corazon Moai Edlira! Je te souhaite ce qu' il y a de mieux, C.a.d, Moi:p

Motel Bogota

No recuerdo quien lo dijo, depronto fui yo, o ellos. El caso es que se lo escuche a mas de un par,que aquello de la mujer perfecta era esa que podia besar como afrodita y escupir como un camionero ruso. Esa misma clase de femina que Huele a rosas pero sabe eructar cual tenor luego de haberse bebido una cerveza sin tener que disimular el paso del alcohol o esas que tienen un aliento de rosas pero aun asi, saben manipular el tufillo a cigarrillo.

recuerdo cuando la conoci. esta no es Marla Singer, Marla vino despues disfrazada de angel. Fue la primera, depronto la primera que le hizo todo un seppuku ( o harakiri) a mi corazon con un machete oxidado. Ya sabeis como se llama y su nombre me produce un einstruende Adrigdulce en la Memoria. La encontre, por Accidente, podria decirse, en esto del internet y algun cafe en el que suelo salirme con la mia. en ese entonces Engel atreyu no exisitia. Tenia 15 anos y lo Mio eran las rusas de poca moral. En esa epoca yo iba a la iglesia y era una oveja entre las ovejas... Fue esta desgraciadita la que empezo mi carrera de Oveja entre los tiranosaurios rex.

Podia decirse que fue mala, aveces podriamos hasta decir que hizo lo correcto y yo simplemente fui muy inocente, con aquello de creer en la gente buena papa o en pensar que los absurdos como yo veniamos al mundo multiplicados por dos. una raza de esa que no sabia leer pero si escribir las historias que ponian a sonar jovenes y viejos, de la misma forma que no sabian bailar pero componer musica extranamente bonita... esos seres que fantaseaban no con las nenas bastantonas corriendo desnudas por una playa sino por una campesina de trenzas viendo un atardecer bien cursi en alguno de los extintos faros de nuestro nuevo mundo. Alguna vez fui un tipo de buen corazon.. ahora sigo siendo un buen tipo, sin esto del corazon porque me toco aprender a usar las tripas para algo mas que digerir comida. En cuanto a la chica, nunca supe realmente lo que paso, pase anos esperando a que volviera y algun dia volvio, tiempo despues de que le dije adios Luego de haber regresado de Muntenia y haber abdicado una triste corona de espinas todo por venir a la ciudad luz a ponerle algo de negro a mi tan perfecta vida.

Nos vimos al regresar de francia, Cabe notar, que esto del viejo mundo lo unico que hizo fue volverme mas hombrecito. aprender a decir las palabras que tocan, a leer entre los dientes de la gente y porque no, a matar panaderos checos. Aprendi a vivir de las papayas que los otros daban y a morir de lo que la vida decia que me era destinado. Europa me quemo el corazon que Ella habia rajado en dos y que marla habia Martillado cual mosaico Art nouveau... En europa un par de albanesas terminaron el trabajo, una con aquello de los placeres infernales y gemidos de Maria Callas y la otra, con algo mas que su ternura y eso que hoy en dia niega haber llamado Amor...

Volvemos a ella. esa tarde, hacia frio en bogota, Cabe notar que bogota ha cambiado desde que me fui. antes era mi jungla, ahora no solo me da miedo sino que simplemente ya no me entiendo alla. bogota, se convirtio en el macondo con desarrollo al que tanto panico le tenemos los exiliados apatridas por naturaleza como yo, vengo de una familia de apatridas, que entendio que el hogar, no es donde vives, sino donde vive quien dices querer.. a ella la quise, con el tiempo, Aprendi a querer mas el odio que le tenia que cualquier cosa que colgara de su cuerpo o su cabeza...

No se porque, hace poco hablamos de nuevo, Luego de que aquellas tacticas de buen Frenchie tres pesos que me cargo no funcionaran, vino guachadas y nada de porno... el tema nenas, esta en provocar, no en salirse con la suya... Sans Arme Sans Haine Sans Violence....

Hablamos hace poco, ya les dije, no se porque, termino ella hablando, por primera vez en algunos anos... la verdad valio la pena escucharle decir que termino metida en un motel, el sabado o quien sabe que puto dia, zapping con el porno y un pobre hombre que no entendio que cayo en las manos de una monja fallida o de una loca wannabe que yo, El principe de Muntenia y hasta Milagro Macondiano sigue queriendo con algo de mediocridad; sabiendo que mi primogenito viene en camino a Amsterdam. la sigo queriendo y esto de imaginarmela en un motel, con un vestido blanco o con encajes rojos me parece tan asqueroso como seductor y por primera vez, entre ella y yo aparecio la complicidad esa que hace que los hermanos que se entienden bien terminen jugando al incesto o que la gente que se odia termine encerrada en los banos de los aviones pretendiendo ese dia haber tenido su mejor orgasmito casero...

Aveces, Pienso en ella.
Pienso en los moteles,
Pienso en mis sabanas
en que ella es peor que el sida el ebola y el bendito anthrax

y en que ojala las ganas la maten algun dia

Moai

Portrait of my beautiful Moai, long before I met her.

How could I start talking about her, if the circumstances in which we met, happened; in the very end, to be a Ubuesque Satyr. It started in a metro, As I did already say. The Man From Strasbourg was listening to the macondian miracle and staring at the martyr of the cure for every bad thing, but the only bad thing without a cure. Love

Roses came and went, between her, Reading the mail of this blind man as she used to, without noticing it, charm me with little explanations about life and love and death, as I just made fun out of misery and struggle. "I did it All for her," I said, Realizing that the last thing I should be doing is keep playing my leading role in hell when I could be setting up the perfect scenario for a new story... Ubu Roi Instead of ubu cocu.. that day when I first Listened to her voice, all nervous, all scared, all expecting the unexpectable, knowing that we were about to fall in our own game with no rules...

Time passed, talking about flowers, roses, bunkers, violins, houses, singing, silence, happiness, sadness, the adriatic, the mediterranean, shqiptarë, Macondo, Girls, boys, youth, age, memories, future, music, cinema, theatre, books, guitars, masterpieces, people, no one, god, devil, Karleken Vantar,pictures, photos, diego, guz, the one that was, the one I wanted to be, life, death, logics, absurdes, sex, more sex ( fuck... it was good), socks, breasts, hair, smells, noises, kisses, love, hate, hate, love, us

And the flowers never rot between her and me, as the dear albanian once called and for the first time, allowed me to look at her face, knowing she had breathed more air than me in my whole life, knowing she has walked here for longer than me, but i never thought it would be this much. I looked at her, admiring her, fascinated, charmed, as she doubted or probably just pretended very well to give a total fuck about me and my passionate living suicidal tendences of the time as she sang enderroj for me and I dreamed of her as she did ( Nature Morte de Lucas, Connu sous le nom de guerre du Miracle Macondien, Avec un chat noommé Lili qui lui leche du citron des yeux) just dreaming of the day i Would finally see her as I woke up from my misery..

the day came, I saw era to get my bag back. I needed to leave for Berlin, in my head, in my head in my head, as Hannan pais the ticket to paradise in exchange of the Hash the dutch left at home. I took a train and fuck I hated trains and the idea of seeing her as I wrote that the train station could be an avantgarde romantic place that day late at night. We came, We saw, We Conquered, in beer and bicycles and manuel and strasbourg and a bed and blood shot eyes, and Violent lovemaking, and tenderness and biting, and fear, and prudeness and amok and loveseeds and Magic and Moai Miracle

time passed
I left.. and cried behind the fucking train window
as I remember her, as alice in Wonderland, Lili in luxembourg, Her in me.
as I love her in such a secret sacred silence

Strasbourg

y que puedo decir

Gracias manuel, por ser mi amigo en estos dias
Gracias Sol, Camila, juancamilo, por haberme hecho sonreir
Gracias Guz, por no haber seguido siento un hijueputica dos pesos
Gracias Catherine, por el cello, por la hospedada en neuhof, por la sonrisa
Gracias Tomas, por ser nuestro Borat Colomboaleman
Gracias Rudi, por la ironia
Gracias stephanie, por los recuerdos
Gracias Melanie, por la comida, la confianza, el violin


Gracias Lili, por las gracias:p Gracias Totales

Guillotine Musicale

el chiste es asi, Favourite bands of yours and the worst Albums they have made.

Garbage: beautiful Garbage

Este disquito tiene un par de canciones que me gustan, pero es como esos ponkes de mil colores que venden en las pastelerias de mediopelo. Shirley manson, mi alterego femenino, disfrazada de nino y cantando tan chillon no me seduce tanto como cuando cantaba milk o push it..

Radiohead: Kid a

la verdad el disco no es malo, y es una buena evolucion musical para radiohead, pero les digo la verdad, Radiohead me empezo a gustar por aquello de la guitarra agresiva de greenwood o del bizzarro de ciertas canciones como just o paranoid android

Rammstein: Sehnsucht

Asi este album tenga canciones como ENGEL, Du hast, Spiel mit mir y Sehnsucht, sigue siendo el peorcito de todos, vendiendo sonsonete burdo y dejando a un lado la belleza que Rammstein peude tener en canciones como Ohne dich o Seemann... sin olvidar el Violento sonido de Moskau o Ich Will. o el porno que du riescht so gut me inspira

Apocalyptica Metallica 4 cellos

se notan que son los primeros pinitos, se nota que vivian en finlandia donde uno se aburre hasta enjabonando a paris hilton, se nota la pobreza en las 8 canciones y la falta de fuerza

Meredith brooks: nisiquiera me acuerdo del nombre de su primer disco

con esta nena me inicie al rock, pateenme si quieren, me gustan sus canciones, es una excelente guitarrista... su primer CD, no no el de bitch, uno anterior, era puro rock de pepe Gringo ochentero que no logre soportar

cranberries: everybody else is doing it so why can't we

No se, Salvation es chevere, pero Una cantante como dolores o riordan no se puede desperdiciar asi, como en ese disco

DJ tiesto, El album de los olimpicos

Lo que tiene de chevere tiesto es que no tiene compasion, ese album me duerme, no tiene picos de estrogeno, no tiene ese toque agreste que huele a rotterdam humeando gas mostaza

Dover Devil Came to me

Esta banda de grunge espanola, al giual que apocaliptica, dejar ver aca su calidad de banda de garaje, eso si, Devil came to me tiene su tumbao

Ritfolk: deshire dhe hestje

aunque esa cancion es desgarrradora, los beatles albaneses, a pesar de su falta de medio tecnico pa poder grabar, no estan al nivel de la inspiracion que los caracteriza en este album, sabiendo que las letras de las canciones son escritas por uno de los mas grandes poetas de Europa del este.

Placebo Meds

Placebo es magico, Meds, es normal

le paso la bola, a NADIE